Steadfast Joy

"God I love how You have given me Joy as a second middle name and just declared that characteristic over my life, like a butterfly. And I love it God how You've created Tim to be Steadfast, like an anchor, and how he reflects that aspect of You so well."

"Karissa.."

"And I thank you God how You are even more my anchor and even more steadfast than he is.."

"Karissa...."

"Thank you Jesus for how You've brought us together and how we balance each other so well."

"Karissa!"

"Yes, Lord?"

"Just because Tim is steadfast does not give you an excuse to not reflect that part of My character as well."

BAM.

And that's how it happened. 

Basically I had been using my (amazing) relationship as an excuse to not grow because, "that's his strength. Isn't it great how we compliment each other?" Not that there isn't some truth to that, but it is not a good enough reason to not pursue becoming Christlike for myself.

I was challenged about how although I could be quite joyful it was not consistent. Frankly I'm only as Christlike as I am at my worst moments. Which meant I had to start over. Go back. Re-look at the fruit of the spirit found in Galatians. Was I ALWAYS demonstrating love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control? HECK NO. Yeah, that's a problem.

I totally was when everything went my way. Isn't everyone? But when things got hard, when I was spiritually attacked, when I was hungry and tired, I was NOT joyful or any of the other traits. 

God has specifically called me to live out Joy, so that's the one He focused on. He brought James 1:2-4 to my attention:

 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,

 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.

 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. (emphasis mine)

I want to lack nothing! I actually really want to be perfect and complete too. So basically I need steadfastness to have it's full effect right? Which means that I have to go through trials. And not just go through them, but meet them with Joy. That's hard. But guess what? James 1:12 says "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love Him." 

So I got a henna to remind me. And because I love henna a lot. 

(sadly it is worn off now)

But man, God is so good. Right after learning all of this I got the opportunity to implement this truth in my life. I went through a trial, but the entire time this is what was going through my head. I could feel the Holy Spirit holding me through the whole thing. And that just made me in awe of how indescribably GOOD God is! And that made me joyful! And then I realized I was joyful, and that made me praise God more for His infinite goodness and I became MORE joyful! It's an incredible cycle.

Now I wake up literally every morning and think, "God, I get to be with You today!" And I get all excited! If I'm ever feeling a bit down I just have to remember that God is good, and I get my joy back all over again. What can I say? I'm in love. I just have to remember everything He's already done, how He is with me and cares about me in that moment and how He has amazing plans for my future and everything is worth it. It has to be Him working through me because otherwise I should be... well how I used to be. But I'm never going back. 

In fact in honor of that I got baptized today! Again. Yeah I know, weird. I was 6 years old when I was first baptized, and I had to take a class and fully understood what I was doing and everything, but I wanted to commemorate how I am a new person and the old Karissa is dead. Also, Jesus was baptized right before He entered into His ministry and I'm about to embark on my adult ministry as well, so it seemed fitting.

I'm doing incredibly well in life now that I'm filled with constant Joy and Love. I'm a crazy Christian that is always excited about what God is doing and talking about Him to random strangers. And that won't be changing anytime soon.